I talked about what it is to be a good friend, and how important these can be in our every day lives.
But have you ever thought of it as a choice, that you chose those that you surround yourself with. Those that fill your life are the ones you have let in. This is what I’ve been thinking about in the last few days looking at who we all choose to surround ourselves, are they people that we want to be like, people that make us feel good about ourselves by being around ….or just the opposite.
Because not always do we make the right choice.
“friends are the family we choose for ourselves”
The hard times are often the ones that make this apparent, the friends we can lose or the ones that really rise to the occasion so to speak and are there for you. At the time this is painful….losing people or at least losing the façade of who you thought they were to you. But in the long term you realise you don’t need always to be the person surrounded by people…you just need those few people who truly know you and love you.
I’ve always loved the saying “a best friend is the one that believes in you even when you don’t believe in yourself”
And that is what I want for the rest 2014 and my life for that matter…not to fill my life with those that make me feel unimportant, undermined, or ignored. That is not to say I need to be everyone’s priority, but to feel like a unnecessary extra, easily replaced or discarded is not what I want for myself or for anyone. And as much as I want to look at the choices I make I also want to make sure that I am never the person who makes anyone in my life feel unimportant.
2013 showed me the importance of the people I surround myself with. Showed me who loved me even when I was finding it hard to love myself. And as we continue into this year I realised that this year is not a year I want to waste on people who to which I am a replaceable. This is a time to look at the year and say…out of all the ones so far this is going to be a biggie, one you’ll look back on and say that was the year it all changed for me and you were the ones that laughed and cried your way through it with me.
Losing Andy meant that our friendship with Debbie took on a whole new dynamic, we watched our friend grieve our heart breaking to see her pain…..knowing that we could never know the full extent of what she was feeling. But it has meant that our friendship as a group has become something we can all rely on, we know that when bad times hit us again we can withstand it together.
We all need people in our corner, supporting us, fighting for us. So today just think about the people you surround yourself with.
But also now that you’ve thought about it….when was the last time you told these people how much their support means to you? If you feel like your never appreciated then maybe start by showing your appreciation for those in your life.
Who do you have in your corner?
Are they fighting for you?